I Thought All My Problems Were Real Until I Realized They Were Just In My Head
- Aleksandar Tosevski
- Feb 18
- 4 min read
We've all experienced those overwhelming mornings when our minds flood with worries about bills to pay, deadlines looming, and a thousand “what ifs” spinning around. It feels crushing, doesn’t it? For a long time, I believed these problems were real, heavy burdens. It wasn’t until I truly understood that many of them were just figments of my imagination that my perspective began to shift.
Understanding the Nature of Our Problems
What if I told you that approximately 75% of our stress comes from problems we can’t control? A staggering percentage of what occupies our thoughts is manufactured by our own minds. This realization was like a wake-up call for me. I started to see many struggles as mere thoughts rather than facts. This change opened my eyes to a new way of thinking.
Instead of viewing life as an endless list of problems, I began to experience it as a journey filled with possibilities. My reactions and choices suddenly became the focal point, guiding me toward positive outcomes instead of a cycle of worry.
The Power of Mental Narratives
One surprising aspect of our reality is the strength of our internal dialogue. Our minds tell stories — some uplifting and others disheartening. I realized many of my struggles originated from the narratives I created.
For example, I once panicked thinking that if I didn't respond to emails within minutes, people would be upset with me. This self-imposed pressure caused unnecessary stress. After understanding this was just a narrative, I allowed myself the grace to respond when I had the time. This simple shift cut my stress levels by nearly 50%.

The Illusion of Control
We often crave control, yet we tend to focus our energy on things beyond our influence. Think of it as trying to hold water in your hands; the harder you grip, the more it slips away. I realized that stressing over things I couldn’t control invited unnecessary anxiety into my life.
To counter this, I started a daily gratitude practice. Each morning, I wrote down three things I could influence that day, like preparing a healthy meal or taking a brief walk. This reorientation helped me slice my anxiety in half, leading to a more peaceful mindset.
Recognizing Thought Patterns
Understanding my thought patterns was another revelation that helped me dismantle my imaginary problems. Concepts from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) made me aware of cognitive distortions—the flawed thinking patterns that often lead us astray.
For instance, I frequently fell into the trap of “catastrophizing.” I would jump to the worst-case scenario in any situation. By recognizing this pattern, I learned to challenge these thoughts with logic. When anxiety crept in, I would pause, assess the validity of my thoughts, and often find them unfounded. This practice not only calmed me but often revealed that my worries were blown out of proportion.
Mindfulness as a Tool
Mindfulness became crucial in my quest to distinguish between real and imagined problems. By practicing mindfulness meditation, I learned to anchor myself to the present moment. Instead of spiraling into worries about the future or replaying past mistakes, I began observing my thoughts without judgment.
Through mindfulness, I became skilled at recognizing when my mind drifted into worry. Gently, I would steer it back to the present moment. This practice helped me see that most of my “problems” were merely passing thoughts with no real power over my life.
Seeking Support
If you find yourself on a journey similar to mine, don’t underestimate the power of seeking support from friends, family, or professionals. Opening up about mental struggles can lighten your load significantly. When I started casually chatting with friends about my concerns, I was amazed to find that many of them felt similarly.
Sometimes, simply vocalizing worries helps put them into perspective. It’s a reminder that we are not alone and that many of our burdens exist only in our minds. This shared experience illuminates these shadowy anxieties, making them feel less daunting.
The Liberation of Letting Go
The ultimate breakthrough came when I accepted it was okay to let go of certain burdens. Holding onto worries acted like lead weights pulling me down. In realizing many of my concerns were fabrications, I discovered a profound sense of liberation.
I began to practice letting go through visualization. Whenever I identified a stressor lacking a solid basis, I pictured it as a balloon floating away into the sky. This simple mental exercise became a powerful tool for release, lightening my spirit significantly.
New Perspective
The reality is that many emotional burdens we carry are illusions of our own making. Recognizing that a large portion of our problems is not real can transform our perspective and restore our peace of mind. It is liberating to understand we can free ourselves from these chains and engage fully in the present.
Living with a lighter heart means consistently addressing our mental health. We owe it to ourselves to challenge our distorted narratives, practice mindfulness, and lean on our community. Life is an adventure filled with ups and downs, but more often than not, the biggest obstacles are those we create ourselves.
So whenever you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to breathe and reflect. Are your problems real, or have you created them in your mind? You may be surprised at what you uncover.
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